State of IDK.

So you have been seeing a lot of reviews of TV shows, reblogs, Oscars coverage and what have you. This time I wanna put a little personal touch on my blog because I am a human after all, I do have feelings and stuff to go through. This is going to be a long one, but I will try to condense it as brief as possible. By the way, IDK stands for I don’t know, in case you didn’t know. (See what I did there)

  • I started my internship as a news writer/proofreader/editorial assistant at one of the movie magazine offices here in Toronto. When I got word that I made a good impression, I was so excited! I’m 3 weeks in and I can’t fully say I’m loving it, though I enjoy writing stuff for the website, proofing the latest issues and giving my ideas on certain projects. It makes me think. I owe it to myself to step up my game when it comes to finding that career that I truly like, and media is the path I mostly want to venture to. It may be unpaid, but at least I’m not working on the burger joint everyday. I hope I get a position here after the 3 months.
  • I really want to take that 6-week summer school in NYU! Okay, this may sound really strange but I believe I stumbled upon that link I saw on the sidebar of my Facebook profile for a reason: and that is to take the risk and go for it. I started submitting my application, I will need a student visa to get there, which is fortunately easy to get (I just don’t know how much), and the tuition which I hope is under $700 because you see I’m just another broke 21-year old. I want to experience NYU, it just feels good that I’m looking forward to something.
  • There’s this girl from my home country, I haven’t seen her since 2009 when we had a reunion (she was my grade school classmate), and that time she had a boyfriend who would pass up as her father. Yes. Over the course of 4 years we caught up with each other and shared stories. Apparently, they broke up and she’s single again. What’s the catch of this story? She started calling me babe, and messaging me constantly, she even told me I was her Valentine’s. She would even call the house, from the Philippines and say hello. I’m a little concerned. I don’t think I have made her feel like I like her, and I can’t even say we’re friends because we haven’t seen each other in a long time. We just exchange sweet words and whatnot, do you think she took that the wrong way? I mean I like her as a friend, someone who I can talk to like twice a month or something like that. But her incessant messaging really is alarming.
  • What else? Hmmmm I’ve been going off at every social networking website about my love for this tv show GIRLS on HBO. It’s so good! I believe I have blogged about it already. As a guy, of course I can’t relate to everything, but the stuff that Hannah goes through and the way it’s being portrayed, it’s definitely something EVERYONE in their 20’s can say “Oh my goodness, that IS totally me!” Lena Dunham didn’t win the Golden Globes for nothing. I hope for more seasons to come til I can say “wow, I’m living that”.
  • This year I just plan to go with the flow. I know nothing I expect will come to life anyway. Just whatever God gives me, I’ll best be thankful that I get to work on something and that I recognize it.

This totally didn’t mean to seem very self-indulgent but I haven’t written about my current state in a long time, and I actually used to! Being in your 20’s, especially the early stages like 21-24 is tough work, and an incredibly selfish time in your life (As Zosia Mamet from Girls said on an interview) but we have to balance our personal lives, and our family, friends, work and everything in between. Lately I feel like nothing is worth sharing anymore since no one really cares if you’re miserable, which in this case is not what I’m going through. I may feel like sometimes the universe is not conspiring with me, but I know that God is preparing something big for me, and I have to work hard to get there.

So if there’s anyone out there feeling down because nothing is going as planned, just know that there’s something that is waiting for you. This may not be the right time, but God is going to give it to you when you’re ready to take it wholeheartedly.

Much love!

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